You can always win over Australians with the offer of a day off.

The Gruen Transfers; “The Pitch” asks two ad agencies go head to head to win a Gruen trophy.   In this clip they try to convince Australians that we need to start a war with New Zealand.  But how do you convince the Australian public to rally behind the idea?  It’s easier than you might think.  Totally tongue in cheek, and no offence to my Kiwi readers…(lol), the two ad agencies do a smash up job of promoting an Invasion.

Fitzy and Wippa – Wrecking Ball parody “She’s got me by the balls”

Yes, both Fitzy and Wippa tell it like it is.  Married life.  In a fantastic parody of Miley Cyrus’s Wrecking ball, this is a humorous look at what its like when a man discovers……she’s got him by the balls.

We met, we kissed I was quite pi/drunk
Our love was destined to survive
Her smell, chanel, I’m giving Brut a whirl
This girl I cant stop looking in her eyes
We went out on dates
She hung out with mates
This is too good to be true
The day she made me cry accepting to be my wife
And that is when they tell you

That now she’s got me by the balls
She Wears me closer than a glove
She questions everyone I call
And no one ever informed me
Yeah you, you tricked me

You read last rites no poker nights
And take all of my band posters down
Joint bank accounts
My cheques now bounce
And wow, this wasn’t written in the vows
She makes me wear new clothes
Boat shoes and beige Chinos
I look like Roger David for you
And now you have imbed this thumbprint on my head
Why don’t people warn you

That now shes got me by the balls
Your looking for the nearest gun
Say goodbye to all your pub crawls
Cause all you do now is renovating
And spending, at Bunnings

I came in like a wrecking ball
Yeah, I just closed my eyes and swung
Left me crunch it in a blaze and fall
All you ever did was break me
Yeah you, you wreck me

I’m looking for the nearest door
My hair is starting to recede
I should be winning on a horse
But im at a Tupperware party
I should be drinking on a golf course
But I’m drinking bloody reisling
I’ve lost all credibilty

On your special day the two words that you say
What comes after “I do”

That’s when she’s got ya by the balls
She doesn’t even have remorse
You live your life in shopping malls
She has got, spilt personalities
Someone please get back my balls
Yeah I’m learning about Vera Wang
I Don’t even know the footy scores
Please help, whats happened to me
Yes I’m, I’m married
Yeah you, you married me

Fitzy & Wippa’s “Cougars” – A parody of Blurred Lines.

 

Yes, as promised here is another parody from Fitzy and Wippa of Nova FM.  If you thought Blurred lines was bad…………lol!

Every cougar get up
Every cougar get up
Hey, hey, hey
Hey, hey, hey
Raaaw, raaaw, raaaw

Well they’re a rare breed of a certain lady
Well they’re a bit loud and a little shady
And they’ll be drinking Cosmos, they’ll end up totally blind
They’ll constantly pinch your behind

She wants to live her life without expectations
She’s been married once, now its co-habitation
She will destroy her liver
Hey, hey, hey
She’ll carve you up on Twitter
Hey, hey, hey
She laughs like Joan Rivers
And that is why we love our cougars
I know you want it
I know you’ve got it
Give me my wallet

 


You’re a cougar
You’re full of plastic
Your boobs elastic
That bra’s fantastic
You give off strong signs
I know you want it
You want you got it
Just please don’t vomit
And you’re a cougar
You praying Mantis
‘Cause once you have this
You’ll rip my head off (they’ll do that)
I have to ask the question
Have you got a skirt on?
Here’s an observation
You’re the oldest chick in this place
But are you married?
So where’s your hubby
Hey, hey, hey
What rhymes with adultery?

 


Hey, hey, hey
They don’t give a stuff, the queens of indiscretion
So much botox, they have no face expressions
You smile you’ll be persuaded
Hey, hey, hey
Say no you’ll be sedated
Hey, hey, hey
You’ll wake up procreating
Hey, hey, hey
And that is why we love our cougars
I know you want it
But you are older
Than Hayley’s Comet
You’re a cougar
Most make up I’ve seen
Looks like a figurine
Maybe it’s Maybelline
You give off strong signs
You signal text me
And you’re suggesting
You’ll bring your bestie
And you’re a cougar
The way you grab me
You think it’s flattering
It’s quite harassing (she’s all over you)

 

One thing that I ask of you
Any chance that I can see your tramp stamp tattoo
From Malibu’s to Blue Lagoons
You’re party rocking like the old Redfoo
Heads up, don’t misconstrue
But your boobs are falling out and they’re in full view
You tell me stories that are bearable
But the lipstick on your teeth is terrible
I pull you up and I ask you why
That picture of your son always make you cry?
You fall on the dance floor, you’re heading south
More extensions in your hair than James Packer’s house
You’re watchin’
You’re waitin’
It’s just sad you’re salivating
And that look tonight that you’re parading
Unfortunately went out with roller blading

Drop your drink, fall down, now get up,
Now adjust your skirt, unbutton your shirt
You’re a classy bird