Let’s see what’s on the slab – SS.


Scene setting – Hell’s Kitchen

co-written with Temp and Moo.


Temp:  Roxanne could only laugh in response to Wilhelm’s joke about Igor’s hump. There was always a cascade of jokes and punch lines delivered in the laboratory. She wouldn’t have it any other way. “He’s Hump Days founder, I swears it!” A hand would be raised and wiggled at Igor after she spoke, followed by a sweet smile. Igor was a strange individual, but also very loyal and helpful. In response to the doctors singing, she moved her body in a seductive fashion. More laughter would follow, and she would begin to walk behind him. While she followed the doctor she nearly burst out laughing, simply due to her remembering him say ‘booby’. Eventually she calmed down as she moved beside the doctor, beginning to place various instruments in their proper locations. The mention of the waiting room as well as any possible patients made her frown, as she knew there currently weren’t any. “Not even one doc, and I even have my girls out!” She placed her hands on her chest and moved her breasts up and down, making a pouty face while she did so.


Razorbackwriter:  At the mention of Roxanne’s girls, the Doctor took out his spectacles and placed them on the tip of his nose to see them better. Ah yes. The perfect pair, the dynamic duo. No finer bosoms in all of hell. The Doctor should know, he made them. Whipping off his glasses with a wave of his hand, he uttered. “Perhaps the Princes of Hell have all started batting for the other team. Gone gay, prefer sausage over taco…Ahaha. Nothing would surprise me with that lot.” It was fair to say that the Doctor had some questionable thoughts about the Princes sexual preferences.

The Doctor thought for a moment, on how to encourage more clientele. A large neon sign perhaps. Radio spots on Hell FM, or even….free nose jobs. They were always popular. “We could have you do a commercial. Perhaps in that nasty nursey outfit, really bring in the punters. Mind you, they would all need bibs to catch the drool.” Hounds…the lot of them, the Doctor thought.

With not a patient to be had, it meant that the team could instead work on the bodies that had come in fresh from the field. First things first was to remove all weapons, clothes and personal affects, that they would sell on Ebay and then give each of the bits a good bathing in bleach or acid; which ever worked best.

“Right, to the chop shop!”

That was what the Doctor called his main lab. Though the Lab was offically called Hell’s Kitchen, he liked to have quirky names for his inner rooms.




Temp:  Roxanne leaned forward when the doctor examined her chest, giving him a much clearer view of them. Once he had finished she adjusted her outfit, taking his little sausage vs. taco comment into consideration as she did so. There was no real way of knowing what the sexual desires of the multiple Princes of Hell were, but it probably didn’t matter all that much. Patients came and went, whether they were here to get something taken care of or just to gawk at Roxanne. Such things didn’t bother her, if anything she enjoyed the attention. Bringing in more patients was definitely something that she was interested in though, and the doctors suggestion of a commercial was definitely interesting. Advertising was definitely a good way to get patients, especially if it was using sexual appeal. “Do a little dance and ring em’ in, I like it!” Although, getting more patients would have to wait…there was work to do! She grinned as she heard the words ‘chop shop’, which meant it was time to go into the main lab and deal with corpses. She had a strange fascination with dead bodies, perhaps it was because she was technically dead. Whatever the reason, she was excited, and stepped up beside Wilhelm. “Ready to go, doc!” The main lab was calling, and there were bodies, bodies everywhere.


Razorbackwriter:  Bodies bodies, everywhere. All were blooded ripe casualties of war. The doctor, with his ever faithful Roxanne – the buxom zombified beautie entered the chop shop as the sound of bodies being dumped on many a table was heard. Igor ever eager to get the ball rolling, and start processing the body parts. One good thing though, he was putting them in piles that were of their race. So, if it was dark elves, or orc, there would be no mix ups when putting bodies back together, or using parts for experiments.


In cages that lined the walls, were various animals that were what one would consider to be mutants. Monkeys with wings, rats with ears growing on their backs. Dog/ Cat hybrids. It really was like something from a terrible horror story, only this was real.

Picking up the head of one poor orc, who had the face only a mother could love, the Doctor got a sharpie, and started making dot marks around his head, for where he planned to cut the skull open to retrieve the brain. He was doing research to see what made them tick and had jars already lined up to take the newly harvested brains. The greeny sick looking head with the mask of death was not pretty, and yet the Doctor handled it like he was dealing with a fine rose or bloom. Delicate hands making light work.

“Turn on the ipod, Roxanne. Let’s have something…cheery to listen to while we work.” The Doc knew she had a good taste in music. Not to mention, with her dancing around with her majestic magoombas in that nurse outfit, it always gave him something nice to look at and enjoy.




Temp:  Roxanne loved working in the chop shop. It was the best place to fulfill her fascination with dead bodies. She walked alongside the Doctor with an excited shake in her step, clearly she was eager to get to work. Stepping away from the Doctor, she approached Igor, who was working on organizing bodies. Her arms would wrap around him from behind, followed by her jumping up and down happily. “Ohhh Igor! You really are amazing y’know!” Roxanne then skipped away, and began to gather various surgical instruments as she approached the Doctor. It seemed he had already gotten started on an Orc, an ugly green colored creature. He was apparently doing some kind of research on that particular race, and was primarily examining their brains. She watched him for a moment, completely entranced by his work, but was snapped out of it as soon as she computed his request for music. “Yessir! Music on the way!” Her body immediately bounced over to the previously mentioned device, which she began to scan through. Eventually she found just what she was looking for, and pressed play. Considering her name was Roxanne, this song fit perfectly for her. It was one of many she loved, especially when she felt like dancing. The version she preferred was different from the one most knew, but was recognizable nonetheless. As soon as the music began to play, she started to dance, moving her body along with the beat. She was well aware of her looks, and how seductive she could be when she danced. It was something she took joy in, for whatever reason. She would continue dancing along with the music, and somehow managed to dismember bodies at the same time. Efficiency!


Razorbackwriter:  Igor’s face twitched when Roxanne got in behind him and brought him into an embrace which had her breasts firmly up against his massive hump. He really didn’t like Roxanne getting so close, in fact he hated his hump being touched. “Ohhh Igor! You really are amazing y’know!” The hump back looked like he had just tasted something nasty. Roxanne may look hot, but in truth she is as cold as death itself.“Eww…Master…Master…she humped my hump!” the hunchback protested before he went back to his work.

Of course, the Doctor was all too busy with the orc head in his hand. Holding it up to the light and then turning it slightly; greenish blood dripping out and down his glove and onto the floor. Wilhelm was almost transfixed by the head until the first strains of Roxanne started to play. That…..song. The Doctor slowly lowered the head and set it down on the silver tray where the scalpel lay beside it – ready to begin the dissection.

Wilhelm’s head turns slowly to where Roxanne – his beautiful creation was dancing. The words spoken in the start of the song bringing back a flood of memories…..of her.

We have a dance!
In the brothels of Buenos Aries
Tells the story
Of a prostitute.
And a man… who falls in love…
With her.

First there is desire
Then… passion!
Then… suspicion!
Jealousy! Anger! Betrayal!
Where love is for the highest bidder,
There can be no trust!
Without trust,
There is no love!
Yes, jealousy…
Will drive you… mad!

If only the nurse knew….what her name and this song meant to Wilhelm. It was the reason he was in hell. It was the reason he created her.

“Roxanne….” Wilhelm said almost breathlessly, as he watched his nurse dance and work at the same time. A flurry of movement and elegance. Macabre….yet he could not look away. As the song reached it’s crescendo, the Doctor’s face was dark like an oncoming storm. He picked up the head of the orc and with a violent explosion of rage he started to rip the flesh clean from the bone sending blood and tufts of hair flying.


His sharpened nails broke through the gloves he wore, and in a shocking move he slammed the skull on the side of the work bench, before tearing out the orc’s brain and tossing it into the glass jar to his right. It landed with a loud splash, before sinking to the bottom. Broken bits of skull lay all over his work station, and he coughed before then smiling once more at his team.

“Such a good song that one.”



Hell’s Kitchen – SS.



Scene setting – The Lab

co-written with Temp and Moo.


Razorbackwriter:  There was still the lingering scent of death high upon the wind, that would reach the towering building known as Hell’s kitchen. Doctor Wilhelm Schwartz stood upon the top most balcony, with a pair of high powered binoculars watching for the return of Igor’s cart. He had sent his most trusted hump backed servant to go and fetch as many bodies as he could, for what would be a wonderful week of dissection and scientific testing. Taking out a pipe, he placed it between his teeth – chewing on the end as he snickered to himself. No more digging about for dead bodies. The wars of the Princes was providing enough bodies to keep him going for a lifetime. Soon he raised the binoculars again, and there he saw him. Riding at the top of a tremendous pile of body parts was Igor. Snapping at the reigns to get the old horse to pull the cart faster. Really the Doctor should have gone to help, but he wasn’t keen on getting his lab coat muddy.

Taking off from his place on the balconey, he ran down the spiral stair case and then out into the main courtyard, as Igor drove the cart load into the open space. Blood was still dripping from many a body and it truly was a gruesome sight to someone with a weak stomach.

“IGOR! WELL DONE! How many did you collect?’ The scientist asked while rubbing his gloved hands together.


“About….fifty. They are really a dead weight when you gotta load em up on top of the other. Most are from Greed. Right shame.” Igor said, jumping down off the pile of bodies and then bowing before his Master. “Where you want them, Master? In the ice room, or in the lab for dissection?”

The Doctor picked up a head off the pile and the turned it around and started to sing.

“I….ain’t got no …..body!”

Igor rolled one of his eyes and then started to offload the cart of bodies onto a waiting trolley. “Lab then.” Together the pair worked to offload the cart, all the while the Doctor had a fiendish look on his face.




Temp:  Roxanne could be heard singing in the distance, the light taps of her heels upon the floor made her approach towards Wilhelm and Igor clear. “Do you neeeeeeed any’boooooody’!?” Her words became completely clear as she walked up next to Wilhelm and Igor, carrying a body along with her. She danced with it and spun towards them both, only to let the body go and flop onto the trolley. “I need some’body’ to looooove!” Her singing and dancing had stopped, since her addition to the docs had been finished. Roxanne would now assist in loading the bodies onto the trolley. “Doc! Igor! How’s it…hangin?” She said as she pulled out a body that had a noose around it’s neck. She couldn’t help but laugh at her own stupid joke. For a group of people handling a bunch of bodies…they all seemed rather cheerful.


Razorbackwriter:  With Roxanne joining in on the chorus of sound that was started by the Doctor himself, you would think that Hell’s Kitchen was more like “Hell’s – Whose got Talent?” not a place where dastardly deeds happened to the dead and…almost dead. The Doctor showed a crooked smile when he heard Roxanne, then he tapped his nose at her pun of the hanging man.

“Do ho ho ho. Splendid…just splendid. Many specimens and all fresh. Look, you can still get a bit of movement out of a few that haven’t had rigamortis set in.” He picked up an arm and waved it at Roxanne, while in the background, Igor was busy trying to dump load after load of dead body bits onto the trolley.

The Doctor’s work was going to be so much easier now, thanks to the war. He was almost hopeful that not all the bodies had been incinerated by the hell fire that came from Wrath. As Igor finished with the first trolley, he then pulled it in towards the lab, while the Doctor addressed Roxanne.

“Ever notice that Igor’s hump seems to switch sides on his back every day?”




Temp:  Roxanne giggled in delight as Wilhelm waved at her with the arm of a corpse, which she immediately responded to with a wave of her own. She was enjoying herself, as was he. The environment they were in combined with their attitudes would likely be disturbing to outsiders, but to them it was the norm. While fumbling with the bodies, she noticed a rather fresh looking female. She laughed as she poked at the bodies chest. “Look Doc! Still Jiggly!” Roxanne giggled as she continue to poke and prod at the corpse, but eventually stopped and continued with loading the corpses. When confronted with the question about Igor’s hump she placed a hand on her chin, gently tapping away as she thought. “Y’know…I have noticed that! Maybe it’s alive! We could turn it into a pet!” Probably not the best of ideas.


Razorbackwriter:  “Well…if anything we know that Igor is always ready for Hump day…get it? Hump..day?! Bahahahaa -cough- Aha.” One thing for certain, the Doctor loved his profession. Anything to do with body parts or blood, or….corpses made him smile. The wicked retorts from his favorite nurse just kept on coming. “More jiggle than jello, in that one. Nothing like a ripe peak on the perfect booby.” With the cart being trundled off by the ever faithful yet slightly macabre Igor, the Doctor then turned his attentions back to the witty nurse. “Roxanne….you don’t have to put on a red light!” If this lab was any crazier you would think it was a musical.

With a renewed skip in his step the Doctor headed inside to his grisly laboratory, where there were already many projects on the go. Bodies suspended in a special amniotic fluid with tubes going in every orifice. There was a large sheet covered object on one of the slabs, that was covered with a sheet, and being strapped down with large iron bands. One…from the vault.

Rubbing his gloved hands together and standing in front a row of machines, that beeped and blinked in a variety of colors, the doctor was truly in his element.

“So….Roxanne. Got any new patients?” He hadn’t checked the waiting room, and figured that Roxanne would know the schedule off by heart.



RPC – Doctor Wilhelm Schwartz for the Seven Sins series.


Name: Doctor Wilhelm Schwartz.

Age: 28

Race: Human

Job: Scientist/Grave Robber/Healer

Personality: Insane, crazed, wicked, mysterious, brooding, evil.

Relationship Status: Single – hasn’t made the right girl yet.

Orientation: Straight, we think.

Likes: Necrophilia, body parts, amputations, Science fairs, comic cons, puzzles, chemistry and biology, dead bodies, zombies

Dislikes: Lively people, sunny days, happy music, Justin Bieber, mid morning television.

Powers: His mind. Able to reanimate dead tissue using his specially designed lab equipment, and experimenting on the unwilling, or the dead.


Weapons: Scalpel.

Strengths: High IQ, being a talented physician, healer, cybernetics scientist.

Limitations/Weaknesses: Being human, he has mortal like weaknesses typical for such. He can die, basically.

Background: Doctor Wilhelm Schwartz was one of the most reclusive and talked about scientists of the age, when ideas of bringing the dead back to life was nothing more than a work of fiction. Noted for his extreme theories, and sickening tests on the young and the disabled; he soon found himself on the wrong side of the law, when caught trying to steal body parts from the New York city morgue for his grisly science experiments. After a serious bout of depression, he would commit suicide in the oddest way, but his body was never found. Having made a deal to sell his soul he wound up in all places…..Hell. Now he is free to work on the many bodies that keep getting churned up from the wars of the Princes. There are simply not enough graves or mass burial pits, so he and his assistant scour the landscape for the fallen, to take back to the Lab. Why not come see….what’s on the slab?

Theme : Repo the Opera – 21st Century Cure.